A Moment of Introspection
Unfortunately it's been way more than a moment. I have been beating myself up for hours.
I am known for having endless patience. Very little ruffles my feathers. But yesterday I felt my patience literally drain away.
The weekend caregiver called in sick and the agency couldn't fill the slots. That left the task to me. After spending all day Friday with her I rose early Saturday morning so I could be at her home when she woke up.
The day was a series of commands; sometimes conveyed pleasantly, sometimes not. I put in 6 hours. Sunday was a repeat.
By Monday I was exhausted. Tuesday morning no caregiver so back I went. I usually spend Tuesday with my Mom but the day doesn't typically start so early. I recognized from the get-go that I was still tired so I knew the day would be a challenge. What I didn't realize was the enormity of the challenge.
There are days when her memory fails her. Tuesday was one of those days. I smiled and answered her questions like she'd asked them for the first time...not the third or fourth. There were requests and commands. It was mid-afternoon when I realized I was exhausted and my patience were waning.
Of course I was never impatient with my Mom but it was the first time I was thankful for her hearing loss because I muttered to myself many times. Seven hours later I was wrapped in the husband's loving embrace and in that moment all was right in the world.
By Monday I was exhausted. Tuesday morning no caregiver so back I went. I usually spend Tuesday with my Mom but the day doesn't typically start so early. I recognized from the get-go that I was still tired so I knew the day would be a challenge. What I didn't realize was the enormity of the challenge.
There are days when her memory fails her. Tuesday was one of those days. I smiled and answered her questions like she'd asked them for the first time...not the third or fourth. There were requests and commands. It was mid-afternoon when I realized I was exhausted and my patience were waning.
Of course I was never impatient with my Mom but it was the first time I was thankful for her hearing loss because I muttered to myself many times. Seven hours later I was wrapped in the husband's loving embrace and in that moment all was right in the world.
What a sweet shelter his arms must have been after such a trying week caring for your mum! Both of you and she are so fortunate to have a loving Care GIVER to ease your sufferings.
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